i went for my kursus kahwin with Mr Fiance 2 weeks ago at Solaris, Mont Kiara. Google for Siarra & Dinderk. Mind this procrastinated post. Oh, he's such a darling to accompany me as this is his second time attending kursus kahwin since some time back.. The kursus that i went is in Solaris Mont Kiara. Tempat elite, i just wonder how elite the kursus gonna be. Perhaps guest of speakers from overseas? haha.
A day before the kursus kahwin i was looking for a new tudung to wear. Well, i guess you should wear proper attire to these kind of courses. Proper attire in my dictionary is a traditional dress and proper hijab to cover the aurat. Better be safe than humiliating myself later, am i right?
Day 1: we were 30 mins late! damn. Mr fiance got the wrong turn and he insisted to leave the house later than my plan. Marah juga dalam hati, but i try not to spill it out. Okkay, i try not to practice blaming culture.. it should start now. I did not say much but he managed to call the admin that we are gonna be slightly late. The admin was cool enough and ask us to just go in.
It was a small group, it was barely 20 people. The area was new and comfy. Men at one side and women at the other. But it caught me by surprise to see how laid back the participants were especially the ladies. Some in jeans.. and guess what? there were only 2 people (including myself) with a proper tudung. The rest just put on shawls with jambul exposing.. hahah funny. Well, i'm not here judging anyone but it was totally different from my expectation. I'm not sorry or regret with my attire but seriously feel its important to respect the speakers. And most of them are among ustaz from jabatan agama. I thought i was the only one who came late, but another couple came in extremely late. The watch clocks 3 quarter of the session. Kalau aku sure dah gelabah giler. Selamba aje minah ni masuk ngan jeans and selendang ala jambul tersembul. What? orang2 yang attend kursus kat sini mmg purposely choose this place sbb nak elak pakai tudung agaknya? heheh....
The first day was okay.. the topics are pretty interesting. Some of the speakers are good by sharing with us some live experience at Mahkamah Syarie. No one asked a single questions.. I was not at all an active participant be it during high school nor lecturers during my education years.. but here i think this is my chance to ask some doubts that i have in mind to be shared among others too. So, i did break the silence by asking the ustaz couple questions. Macam berani je.. hahah.. soalan berbunyi begini:
"Ustaz, jatuhkah talak jika sisuami mengucapkannya secara verbal tetapi di depan rakan bukan di depan si isteri". Biar betul aku tanya soalan tu.. heheh. but i really need this to be clarified. Ustaz recognized it was a very good question indeed. If you wonder what is the hukum. "Talaknya sah" jawap si ustaz.
Do you know that the divorce statistic last year occurs once every 15minutes. I was like.. what??!! Macam takut je kan? And according to ustaz again, tempoh critical dalam sebuah perkahwinan adalah dalam 5tahun pertama dan banyak kes cerai alaf baru terjadi dalam tahun ke-2. Kecut perut dengar ustaz ni. Takut nak kahwin pun ada. Anyway, kalau nak cerita pasal topic2 masa kursus kahwin ni mmg tak habis nak citer dalam post ni. You all pergi sendiri dengar sendiri lah ok? Bukan apa, atleast we know our rights sebagai isteri. Especially bila masuk kes penderaan mental dan fizikal. nauzubillah. Most tortured wives choose to remain silent and let their husband do whatever they want. How pitiful.
Day 2 : I made sure we reached there on time. We managed. Guess what?? The girl who wore proper tudung yesterday changed her theme today. No more tudung, selendang with a decorated jambul, a very tight legging and a cardie. hehhehe.. so i was the only girl with proper tudung. haih, macam-macam.
The second day's topic was pretty dry. And the nasi lemak provided buat mata ni rasa ngantuk. Saw few people tersengguk2.. I tried to fight the lethargy. The girl who sat beside me yesterday tak habis2 browsing ngan ipad dia and ber bbm. Khusyuknya. Sampai ustaz panggil pun tak sedar. To me, if you hate the kursus kahwin so much or you've been forced with a knife on your neck sekali pun, just bear 2 days and show some respect to the speakers..kan dah kena soal ngan ustaz.. well, atleast the guys are behaving well and giving full attentions to it. Ustaz tanya bukan nak test knowledge, cuma nak share pendapat and get opinions.. or maybe ustaz get distracted with that ipad..
The most awaited topic, which is the "procedure and documents for marriage" was kept to the last 2 speaker. And it was a very short one. 10 mins or less if i can remember. The last speaker with a topic "kesihatan" really test everyone's patience level and we were like in a siapa-tahan-mengantuk contest. tik tok tik tok.. lambatnya slide ni nak gerak. Kenapalah doktor ni citer lama sangat kat piramid makanan??? urkh. I saw Mr fiance's chin already touching his chest.. mata pejam baek punya. I tried ringing him dengan harapan mobile phone akan bergegar dalam kocek lantas mengejutkan dia from his dreamland. Tapi nyata sia-sia. Hampa. Tepat jam 7 malam. Alhamdulillah.. semua orang lega kursus berakhir.
balik.. ngantuk.. letih otak sbb so much info trying to squeeze in dalam otak yang semakin mengecil ni.
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